Amsterdam, late February. Early afternoon. Oud West walk-in centre. Inside it is full of men. A few greet new arrivals. But most prefer to sit quietly for a while. With a sandwich or something warm to eat. And a steaming cup of coffee or tea. Outside, the cold is definitely not out of the air yet, and the wind is certainly not. The ETHOS census published in October 2025 showed that between thirteen and fourteen hundred people sleep outside in the Amsterdam region. Almost ninety percent of them are men. Who are they? Meet Michel and Gamil, two experienced outdoor sleepers.
Currently Michel (52) is sleeping indoors for a while through the winter shelter offered from December 1 to April 1 in Amsterdam to two hundred and fifty people who have been in the region for some time. Before that, he slept outside for months. After that, he probably will again. He apologizes for being a little late, getting right to the point. "Sorry, I had to shower, just threw up. They had different things to eat here. With cheese, pate ..., and also pizza. That doesn't go well in my stomach with my alcoholism. I've been looking for help for months; I want to be in a closed clinic. My life is so rotten right now. I'm tired of living."
Internship
When asked, he sketches a brief picture of the life behind him. "At 16, I ran away from a boarding school," he says. To convey the seriousness of that situation, Michel says that later in life, he always found acquaintances from boarding schools in institutions. "And also the people I meet on the street: all of them have been in a boarding school." He continues to have seen a lot of abuse around him. "But fortunately haven't experienced it myself. I do beat off." So a difficult childhood, after which he kept going off the rails. Things got better for a bit longer around 2001. "I was doing well with a job in catering at De Wereld Draait Door, there in Amsterdam-Oost, you know, near Artis. Then I had a house, everything."
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In 2023, Michel entered an addiction clinic near Rotterdam after a long period of breakdown. Eighteen months later, he was back outside on May 5, 2025. Clean and healthy. "In the clinic we got vitamins, we cooked ... And what was very important there: the feedback from fellow inmates." Things went well for quite a while after that, until one day Michel traveled from Rotterdam to Amsterdam. Four days later, his follow-up aid program at a care organization in Amsterdam was to start. "It was the middle of summer. I wanted to take my bike from Rotterdam to Amsterdam in advance. That day I had a relapse. I thought: two, three beers ...but I can't do that." Michel reported to work a day later than agreed and lost his help program in Amsterdam. Visibly affected, he keeps repeating, "If only I had ... then," and, "If only I hadn't ...," in all sorts of variations.
Rats
.Well, he stayed in Amsterdam. "But without follow-up treatment, you can't stay clean. Right away I was back to alcohol completely. On beer, I mean. I only drink beer." During this period Michel started sleeping outdoors. "First for a while in the bushes near a little tunnel in Old South. In one of those tent-like sleeping bags [ed. Sheltersuit], nice and warm. I slept as long as it was dry and if it started to rain, I pulled a string and had a tarp. That way I was lying there just fine. Only that place was also next to a school, so I left after a while. Not because I was afraid of the judgment to drink a beer, but of the image of "that old guy in the bushes next to a school. Then I went to sleep on a bench in Heineken Square. Together with a friend. Who slept a little further down the road." But what seemed safe for a while also turned out to be risky. "One night I couldn't sleep and I saw the rats running over the heads of the others."
Tent
Now Michel is allowed to sleep in a room for six on Transformatorweg until April 1. He is grateful because he sleeps well there, although it can also be tough. "For example, it happens that someone in the room smells really bad. Yesterday we forced one person to take a shower together. He himself didn't understand a thing." Very consciously, Michel enters the shelter as late as possible in order to have as little contact with others there as possible. "I prefer to sleep with friends around me, then I know if trouble comes, they will help me." When asked where he will sleep after April 1, he philosophizes a bit. "On Heineken Square is possible, but that's where you have to watch out for rats. Or, I will arrange a tent. I'll have to store it somewhere during the day and in the evening I'll pitch it in the Amsterdamse Bos. With a bicycle I can do that. Because you can't leave your tent there. The municipality will take it away. You will be very tired in the evening and your tent is gone, that's all you have then ..." Michel emphasizes that cleaning up as an outdoor sleeper is important anyway. For example, he says that for a while he slept in a porch and got tea and cookies there every morning. And that once he was caught as a sleeper on a boat, but the man let him. "As long as you keep it clean."
Recording
.But Michel would prefer to be included. "All my real friends I know from the clinic. You get to know those when you're sober. I know I'm a heavy alcohol junkie right now; I can't stop. If I were to stop all at once now, I would go into delirium. Then the withdrawal symptoms are too intense. I've never had it as bad as I have now." Oud West is the only walk-in centre Michel attends. "That feels familiar. I feel comfortable here. Safe. And they help me look for help. Sometimes they even force me to go to the hospital." With a social worker at the walk-in centre, Michel is in the process of being admitted.
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Of the twenty-five years Gamil (49) has been in the Netherlands, he has been sleeping outside for seventeen. Once he fled from Yemen and to this day he carries the stamp "undocumented. In Yemen, he was a businessman, he says. "Via France and Germany, I ended up in the Netherlands. At the time I tried to apply for asylum, but I didn't succeed because I didn't dare to do it under my own details. I didn't want my country of origin to find out ... Then I still wanted to go back, but that didn't work out either. I couldn't manage to get a ticket. Then my mother said on the phone from Yemen, 'please stay there, it's better,' and I stayed."
Vondelpark
.Gamil always sleeps in the Vondelpark. "By the white building in the garden. There I have plastic, and a mattress, a blanket, a pillow, everything ..." Never does he sleep in the shelter, because it is too crowded for him there. "At least in the park I'm alone. If there are people around, I can't sleep." When asked if he's ever cold, Gamil answers deliberately flippantly, "Once in a while, but that's good for me. I have an allergy and it bothers me especially when it's hot. I get bumps from the sun. Last summer my leg was all blue from it."
Heart failure
In the Oud West walk-in centre, he does enjoy coming. "It's good there and they always help me." Like Michel, Gamil likes the permanence of one walk-in centre. "I don't go anywhere else, because then there are other people too." Furthermore, he spends his time outside and walks a lot. To which he shows off his pacemaker. "Look. I had one heart attack in the Oud West walk-in centre and the second in the hospital. Twice heart failure." As a result, he may soon get his Dutch papers, Gamil indicates hopefully.
Text: Jola Gosen | Photography: Ewa Wielgat