John (60) is buddy to a New Dutchman: "Being there for someone else is one of my values in life."
"During the first lockdown I started looking for volunteer work, I had had it a bit with sitting at home. Through the Vrijwilligers Centrale Amsterdam I saw the call for lhbt+ buddies, I responded. I was matched with a young gay man who was in the asylum process. It was a very lonely and exciting time for him. When you're in that procedure, you're basically stuck. You can't go anywhere until you get an answer. This is difficult for all people in an asylum center, but LGBTQ+ people are often really alone. In his case, he comes from North Africa, his family also does not understand why he has fled, they cannot talk about it. Both his parents died and his application was rejected. Then he was quite depressed.
Network under construction
.When we made appointments, it was still lockdown, we often went for a walk in Amsterdam. And if it rained, we would meet at the central station, haha. You really couldn't go anywhere, that was a challenge yes. Later, on appeal, he did receive residency status. Then I helped him paint his new apartment. Meanwhile, little by little, he is getting a network and new acquaintances. Through the integration course and a dinner from De Regenboog Groep, he meets people who are in similar situations. Our coupling, as it is called, ends in a while. That's the way it works. But I do think we will keep some contact. Still, it's nice to know how he's doing.
Value in life
For me, it's a nice contact that gives me a new perspective on things. For example, I didn't know before how lonely it must be for asylum seekers. I am also impressed by the events he has endured. For myself, one of my values in life is that I can be there for someone else. I would also recommend volunteering to anyone. It doesn't take much time and you can really help. If everyone did it, in any form, the world would be a more beautiful place."
Text: Sander Kersten and Jola Gosen | Image: Tessa Posthuma de Boer
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